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Tempting the fates/Leaps and bounds.

2007-09-04 - 10:46 a.m.

I feel like I’m being suckered by my uterus. Still no period. BUT my basal body temperature seems to be fluctuating within .2 degrees of 98. I’ve never dipped below 98 and not gotten my period within 48 hours before. I did get some very, very slight spotting/discolouration starting on Friday. And I swear I’ve been cramping slightly since last night.

It’s like the fates are trying to get my hopes up enough to sucker me into buying a pregnancy test, and then are going to hit me with a negative result and make me feel silly for even testing.

I was so convinced that I was pregnant last cycle; this cycle I’m so convinced I’m not. Granted, last cycle I ignored evidence such as two negative pregnancy tests and a falling basal body temperature. This time around I’m loathe to make the same mistake. I did, after all have both these things happen this cycle too.

And yet, and yet, and yet…

I cannot help but think that Friday would have been, if my calculations are correct, day 11 post-ovulation, which is a perfectly reasonable timeframe for implantation. And implantation often does cause a little spotting. I can’t help, therefore, going to a due-date calculator just to see, for the heck of it only of course, what date that would make a theoretical baby due and what that would mean if we were, in fact to plan a c-section at week 39 (May 5th – my youngest brother’s birthday).

See? Right here, I feel like I’m cursing the whole thing just by daring to write this sort of speculation. Gah!

Let’s change topics to my real, vs. theoretical, baby. This weekend Grommet hit two interesting milestones. I don’t know if they’re official milestones, but they seem significant to me. The first is that, out of the blue, she’s started saying “poop,” followed by, “potty” quite frequently. We were surprised because we haven’t been pushing any kind of early potty training agenda, but we’ve obligingly perched her little rear on the potty when she’s asked. Even better, it turns out that my mother had a little cushioned toilet seat on hand that fits over the toilet (my sister in-law left it for reasons not quite clear to us). We didn’t know this at first and the Grom didn’t seem at all keen at the lack of support between her and the toilet bowl – the cushioned ring was a vast improvement. Still, even before the ring came out she continued to ask to be put on the potty. And when she was given her seat, she immediately plunked it down on the floor and sat on it, declaring “potty!” excitedly. We’re in no hurry though – if she asks for the potty that’s fine, but if she doesn’t we’re fine with that too. She’s only 19 months, after all, and we expect at least another half year before getting into this sort of thing.

The other thing that seemed cool to me is that, in the past, when asked “What’s your name?” Grommet would reply “Name!” Yesterday, for the first time, she actually said her real name! I’m not sure what this means in terms of “official” advancement, but it seemed very cool to me; I gave her lots of praise and she rightfully seemed pretty proud of herself.

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