Compartment 14B

To wean or not to wean, or, I never thought I�d write about my boobs so much on the internet. 2007-01-28 - 9:01 p.m. Grommet is officially over a year old. Technically I could wean her at any time and still be lauded by most for having �persevered� for as long as I did. After all, I�ve met the minimum recommended target of a year: far more than many mothers. And her top teeth are growing in and, even though she doesn�t actually bite me, they�re making feeding less comfortable because they press into me when she sucks. More importantly, I know I can�t move forward with our plans for conceiving again until I wean. But here�s the thing, weaning and putting her in her own crib at night go hand-in-hand. If she can just roll over and demand the boob in the middle of the night it would be a hard, hard thing to deny her, particularly if my valuable sleep is hanging in the balance. And I love sleeping with her. Moreover, at the end of a long day, when she�s cranky and tired and frustrated and wailing, and her dad can�t make a dent in the noise or tears flowing, no matter how much he tries, there is just such an overwhelming feeling of relief when I lay her in our nest, tug off our bulky winter outer layers, yank up my shirt, and� immediately her wails are silenced, I curl around her as she settles in, warm and baby-smelling, her little shins and feet tucked up against my thighs, her tiny hands patting or laying against my belly or sometimes cupping my boob on either side like she�s drinking from a big mug. Slowly I feel her body relax and the rhythmic sucking starts to lull me into sleepiness too. Eventually either she breaks her latch or I break it, or, even better, she falls so deeply asleep that her tiny mouth goes slack and lets go on its own. She only wakes briefly to get her �fixes� of milk and reassurance that I�m still there throughout the night, and I don�t mind trading those short sleep interruptions for the closeness of having her there with me. In truth, it breaks my heart more than a little to contemplate giving that up. So yes, I want a sibling for Grommet. And yes, that will mean weaning her. But I don�t think I�m quite ready to do it. Soon, I tell myself, soon. But not yet. Before - After All content � Shawna 2003-2010 That means no swiping my stuff - text, images, etc. - without asking. P.S. If you're emailing me, replace the [at] with @ in the "to" line. Oh, and if you put the word "journal" in the subject line it'll have a better chance of making it past my junk mail filters. recommend me HTML and design help by Jo hosted by Diaryland