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Whatever the weather, we’ll share it together, whether we like it or not.

2006-05-10 - 10:58 p.m.

Anyone recognize the song the title is quoted from? While I know the song, I’m not 100% convinced I know where it’s from, but my best guess is The Polka Dot Door. Anyway, my point is that I’m loving the warm spring weather we’ve been having, even if it is supposed to cool off and get rainy on the weekend.

It’s the Tulip Fesival ‘round these here parts so it’s kind of a shame that the weather won’t cooperate for the tourists this weekend (if the forecast is to be believed that is). This reminds me that I was planning on getting a fancy-schmancy camera to take pictures while I tiptoed through the tulips. It also reminds me that a good friend and woman who acted in the role of bridesmaid for me was supposed to come visit during the tulip festival, in lieu of a visit at the beginning of February (the weekend before I was due and, it turned out, the second weekend after Grommet’s birth). Well, the former purchase was put on hold due to uncertainties with financing a move to a new house, and in the latter case I have not heard from this friend. Like at all. Not since before the birth. And I am just a teeny bit hurt by this ‘cause I drove the six hours to her baby shower, and she couldn’t make it to mine but I kind of thought that I’d at least get a congratulatory email after the birth. But nada.

Oh well, there are some people who you just have to decide whether the good overshadows the bad or not and, if it does, accept them as they are. This is such a friend. She’s a bit flighty and not the most reliable person when it comes to plans, but she is one of the nicest, warmest people I know and worth the occasional episode of getting my nose slightly out of joint.

As I’ve gotten older, I find that I’ve got less tolerance for people who bring more negative than positive to my life. These are the energy vampires; the ones that you stay friends with more out of habit or even guilt. You know the type: you feel bad and impolite if you don’t return their phone calls because they’re making an effort to stay friends with you. My mother has a friend that constantly criticizes her – her clothes, her house, her hair… you name it. At the same time, this friend is very boastful about any aspect of herself you can think of. She doesn’t have a lot of friends (despite her self-proclaimed beauty and sense of style) and I think she considers my mother her best friend.

My mother is a wonderful woman and a total softie. She is friends with this downer and even considers her her best friend too because (are you ready for it?) the downer makes the effort of calling her. She has drifted away from many people she really enjoys spending time with for the simple reason that she’s always busy with gardening or working on a project so she never has time to call anyone. So, when someone calls her, that person by default gets to be her friend, whether she likes them personally or not. It’s frustrating for me to watch because I, of course, think my mom deserves better. Over the years I’ve seen her put up with way too much from some of her “friends”, including taking huge advantage of her generosity. The one I just described is nothing compared to others who have gone so far as to outright steal from her. Yet my mom finds the good in everyone and is still friends with anyone who wants to be her friend. A character in a book I once read (I wish I could remember which one) once said, “Even Hitler liked dogs.” She meant that no matter how bad someone is, you can always find a good thing to say about them, but that shouldn’t be used as an excuse to put up with the poisonous rest of their personality.

If there’s one hope I have for my mom this year, now that she’s getting rid of her millstone of a boyfriend, it’s that she meets new friends and reconnects with old ones that are good, solid people that treat her well and that have similar interests and bring just as much to the friendship as my mom does.

Hm. This didn’t turn out to be about the weather much after all. Still, I've got that song stuck in my head, so I'll leave the title as is.

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