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Compartment 14B

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Navel gazing.

2006-02-13 - 11:46 a.m.

Grommet has a belly button! Her umbilical stump came off without fanfare or fuss at two weeks of age. I had been warned by more than one person that the stump would stink, as it was essentially rotting flesh, but it remained completely odourless until it detached. I don�t know if this is because we only bathe Grommet a few times a week (we don�t want to dry out her skin � easy to do in the dry winter months � so we don�t bathe her too often and when we do we do so with just water most of the time) so the stump had lots of chance to dry, or if it�s because we didn�t use any sort of treatment on it (which is what was recommended to us � they used to use alcohol or other antiseptic treatments but a study showed that it didn�t have any impact on infection and stumps rinsed with water only dropped off a day earlier to boot).

She�ll be 3 weeks (already!) tomorrow, and she seems to be growing right before my eyes and despite the voracious appetite (she eats every 2 to 3 hours) she�s not chunking up, but seems to be elongating instead. I can feel the difference when I�m carrying her in my arms and she doesn�t fit as snugly in my cradle hold as she used to. When I look at pictures from her first few days I definitely see the difference already. I�d actually like to see a bit more flesh on her bones; especially if it means being able to go a bit longer between feedings. Babies should have a nice cushiony layer of baby fat.

A couple of points I missed in my post about breastfeeding:

I know that there are some who counsel wearing a bra even through the night. I believe this is for support and to hold breast pads in place. When my milk came in, however, the one nursing bra I bought was too small and constricting to be comfortable, particularly overnight. What I ended up doing, and have done since was fold a soft flannel receiving blanket into a long band and wrap it across my chest. Since I�ve been sleeping on the couch since coming home, I don�t toss or turn so it stays where I put it. Besides, I�m only sleeping a couple of hours at a stretch between feedings, so it�s not like 8 hours of moving in my sleep would displace it. It�s much more soft and comfortable than a bra. Of course, my boobs are still not huge compared with those of many nursing moms, so this may not work for everyone.

The couch is the other thing: when I came home I foolishly tried to stay in my own bed. I discovered very quickly that getting up from a totally flat surface when one has had a recent cesarean is a singularly unpleasant experience. The second night I wised up and moved to the couch downstairs, with the Grom in her cradle nearby. That way I could use the arms and back as leverage to muscle my way into a sitting position using my arms more than my abs. And once I was sitting, I already had a back support behind me and I didn�t have to change to a different chair for nursing. Over the following few days I refined my �nest� to include a tray table with the essentials on it (water, a snack, Kleenex, the portable phone, etc.), and a makeshift changing station nearby so that I didn�t have to try to maneuver up and down the stairs. I now come upstairs to change her, and take over the bed in our bedroom after J gets up, but I�m still downstairs for the night.

Yes, I miss sleeping in my own bed. But since J has to get up at 3:30 am on weekdays and 4:30 am on weekends it just seems like I should do what I can to make sure that while he�s in bed, he actually gets to sleep and not have to wake up when I do every two hours during the night. Even going to bed at 8:00 pm most nights, he runs a sleep deficit that he never really recoups. Fortunately, he�s just hired a new guy who will eventually be able to open on the weekends, so at that point J should be able to have a day or two a week that he can sleep in. He�ll still have to go out to the business every day, but he won�t have to go in for opening and he won�t be actually working the till seven days a week.

For my part, I don�t actually feel very sleep deprived. I usually go to bed when J does, and even with getting up every two hours to nurse and change diapers, I make up for it by staying in bed and sleeping when Grommet sleeps until I wake up feeling rested. I highly recommend doing this if you can � it makes all the difference in healing, not to mention in maintaining a good attitude towards new-parenthood. And of course, I couldn�t do this without J�s support; he takes care of almost everything but the breastfeeding when he�s home. I do small chores and laundry and try to plan for/provide meals, but he�s really carrying the lion�s share of keeping the household running by getting all our groceries and supplies and changing and bathing Grommet when he�s home. I am a lucky woman.

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