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Compartment 14B

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Feeling left out.

2004-09-13 - 3:00 p.m.

This weekend was very low key for us; we stayed in on Friday and went to a bar to watch the hockey game with a friend of Saturday, but still got to bed early. We both worked both days since I was at the gym teaching and J hasnít yet trained his new employee sufficiently to have him coming in on his own to open on the weekends. We rented a movie last night (50 First Dates) which was OK but not so riveting that we felt we couldnít shut it off half way through to go to bed. Weíll probably watch the rest tomorrow night.

One of the reasons this weekend was so quiet was Jís group* of friends had mostly gone off to the cottage belonging to one of them. They werenít around when we were calling to see who wanted to go watch the game. Hereís the thing though, we werenít invited. I would have said that this group consists of 5 couples, including us, but now Iím thinking maybe itís more like this group consists of 4 couples, plus us. We have no idea why we werenít included in the invitation. I donít think itís that we were just imagining weíre considered good friends Ė we see them all the time. I go to girl-only dinners with just the cottage-owner every now and then, and J is going to be the emcee at the wedding of the cottage-owners next summer. Theyíve asked me to be in charge of the decorations.

So what I want to know is, are we good enough friends that they feel comfortable asking us to do work for them, but not good enough friends that they want to bring us along for the fun stuff? I have no idea what is up with that. The only thing I can come up with is that they knew J and I would be working so they knew we couldnít come anyway. But if thatís the case, what skin off their nose is it to ask and that way we feel wanted even if we canít actually make it?

I was of two minds about writing this post Ė I donít like to put anything up that might hurt anyoneís feelings if they stumbled across this site. And believe it or not, the female-half of the couple in question is one of the few people I see on a semi-regular basis I was considering giving my URL to. On the other hand, itís not like Iím calling anyone names, just mentioning that my nose is a bit out of joint, and posting the story might clear things up, since she might let me know what the reasoning was. I guess once I hit ďpostĒ Iíll have decided to take my chances.

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* J has a cohesive group of friends in which everyone hangs out together. I have a bunch of friends but they donít know each other so we tend to see them one or two at a time. This means is we alternate itís like: Jís friends, my friend A, Jís friends, my friend B, etc., so you can see how long it sometimes take to cycle back to friend A if I try to see all my friends from A to M equally. The result? We spend way more time with Jís friends (now sort of my friends too) as a whole.

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